Chapter 9: Nine Times the Video Surveillance Camera Came in Handy

Janey:

Worse. Worse. Worse. Worst yet (if there even is a worst), I have documentation that he has posted my name and information on Craigslist when we would go out on dates or I would travel by myself. Marc provided locations, times, and my picture so that others could come and check me out. His “hot girlfriend.”

I greatly fear what his motives were here, as noted in my concerns above. He mentions being able “to facilitate and act on the discussions of what could be done” to me. Each message to people includes the words, “My girlfriend has no idea I’m doing this.”

That statement is probably one of three truths he spoke in ten years.

I had no idea I was being set up and being watched. I had no idea Marc was leading this life, and setting me up for god knows what – giving strangers on Craigslist access to me (where we lived, pictures, what my profession was, where we would be on date nights) all without my knowledge and all without my consent.

Think about this for a minute. His actions were not something I knew about, nor wanted to participate in what he is suggesting. Again- CONNECT THE DOTS! So, I wonder how he was going to pull this off. Drug me? I could have been stalked, harmed, killed by strangers from his actions. I don’t know if the plan was to drug me and rape me or what he was trying to “facilitate.”

I travel a lot for work. I couldn’t figure out why I would have to get security to walk me to my room because another patron wouldn’t leave me alone at the bar. I would have to change rooms when people would call my room without me knowing who they were. I really thought the world had become an evil and vile place. I spent a lot of time yelling at hotel staff for giving out my information to strangers- all with their firm denial they had done so. Little did I know that the man I loved was giving out all my pertinent travel details to “facilitate” some unknown action.

Also, there is a date night I can’t remember. A pretty big date night where we sat in a suite for a huge public event. I don’t remember a thing. In fact, I never knew we even went until he mentioned it and I had to admit I didn’t know anything about it. I thought he was joking with me. He actually spewed out the truth, and then HE TOLD ME HE WAS JOKING WITH ME!! I remember telling him the joke was weird and stupid and how did he even think this was a joke. Never thought anymore about it until I found a site on Craigslist for “bring by your incapacitated girlfriend and watch while I F&%K her.”

Think about that for a minute… there is a club where people are encouraged to bring by their incapacitated loved one and watch them be raped by a stranger. And Marc received email updates about the group activities. Daily.

I’m beginning to wonder how far his sickness has extended to me. I have no memory. I have no proof of his actions. Just the knowledge I don’t remember an entire event, his telling me about the event, and the Craigslist sites he posted to. Gives me panic attacks. Tonight I talked to a man about hiring a private detective to try and uncover additional secrets. This is mixed with a heavy amount of “do I want to know?”

But hold on to your hat… it gets worse. Right before all this, I was hospitalized with serious health issues. I could not be revived when my body stopped working and wouldn’t restart. (I have a great story for another time, about my argument with a leather clad St. Peter who would not let me into the fabulous party I could see and hear behind this velvet-roped opening.)

Where was my fiancé right after this happened?

He left within 45 minutes. He left me alone in the hospital, having just died. Marc claimed he had to get home to his child. The child is 18. Marc claimed he had to get home to make sure his offspring was fed and got to bed. Did you catch the age? EIGHTEEN!!!!! The legal adult stayed by himself for four days when we went to Jamaica, and eats just fine when we travel FOR DAYS ON END. The legal-aged adult spends plenty of time BY HIMSELF. Guess what?

His offspring wasn’t even at our home the night I died.

There was, however, activity in and out of our house all night caught on the security system. The grainy video shows people coming into my home all night long. I’m left wondering who all he texted to meet at our home for sex and drugs once he knew I was going to be admitted to the hospital. This also tells me he must belong to some secret sex club if he has people on his cell phone. I guess these Craigslist people have gone from strangers to “come to my house to fu$k” friends.

Honey – It hasn’t been a good year, which is THE understatement of the year.

All my devotion,
Maya

If you’re reading this chapter and it hits too close to home, you are NOT alone. This type of abuse is more common than people think in relationships. If you choose to talk to a therapist about it, I would suggest you watch this webinar from DomesticShelters.org first AND show them the webinar, too. Otherwise…..well……they could not believe you.
Therapists, counselors, police, judges ALL NEED TO KNOW this happens. Please don’t stop talking. Please. You’re worth it.
https://www.domesticshelters.org/videos/when-abusers-drug-an-intimate-partner